就要离开了。
如果不是出去念书，我不会真正知道父母赚钱有多难。当你一天只给自己十块钱的生活费时，才真正知道什么叫钱不够用。
如果不是离开家里，我也不会发觉到我竟然还会想念家里那个整天惹人生气的allan chai. 更不会知道原来他也在慢慢长大，变得有一点有礼貌。（虽然暂时对我依然是那副臭脾气）
如果不是过年回家，我不会发现妈妈到底有多好。每天烦我到底要煮什么给我吃，是猪脚醋春卷饼干还是浙江排骨，但其实就算她煎一粒蛋给我，我都觉得很满足。
昨天她又问我明天的早餐想吃什么，我说想吃炒面。隔天一大早起来果然就有一大盘很香很香很香的炒面在桌上。我后来才知道，为了那一盘炒面，她特地很早起床，跑了很多地方才买到了鸡蛋面。
一个人生活，我才发现到原来家里那一大盒的橡皮筋都是靠妈妈平时慢慢存起来的。从前的我根本不会去理会这种生活中的小细节。洗衣服要分开洗，不能让衣服印到其他颜色；地板原来要天天扫才不会看见女孩们满地的落发，买玩东西后的塑料袋要很细心地折成三角形，还有千万不能让alarm snooze 了又snooze,因为这里没有妈妈不厌其烦地叫我起床。
正是因为明白钱有多么难赚，我很常提醒自己要努力读书，不能浪费父母的钱。
突然发现我在美里时一天花的钱都比在外多，因为妈妈永远是最方便的提款机。
但是当我面对真正的提款机时，就连吃午饭时多叫一杯水都不舍得。
最近脸不断变圆，裤子越来越紧，我想是因为我觉得花了钱就要把东西吃完的关系，常常把自己撑的好饱。什么都可以妥协，唯有体重不能！这种贪小便宜的心态，SHOO SHOOOO!
Bye :P 要去机场了 ：）
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Saturday, January 28, 2012
We've done nothing wrong and I really hope that there will be no thorns in our hearts.
I can't even figure out why is this happening. I hope I'm the one who think too much, like I always do.
And please, I wouldn't bother about anything anymore.
If somebody has to be blamed, it will be me because I have no courage to make it clear and to insist that I really don't mind at all. Put the blame on me because I have a complex mind that drives me to think too much.
At this moment I hope I'm still the low self-esteem girl who think I don't deserve anything, only then I wouldn't fall for anyone before.
Why am I here emo-ing when I'm supposed to be in a good mood -.-
I can't even figure out why is this happening. I hope I'm the one who think too much, like I always do.
And please, I wouldn't bother about anything anymore.
If somebody has to be blamed, it will be me because I have no courage to make it clear and to insist that I really don't mind at all. Put the blame on me because I have a complex mind that drives me to think too much.
At this moment I hope I'm still the low self-esteem girl who think I don't deserve anything, only then I wouldn't fall for anyone before.
Why am I here emo-ing when I'm supposed to be in a good mood -.-
Sunday, January 1, 2012
1.1.2012. Time to conclude my 2011.
January 2011
Prefect camp. I was in the same group with people I appreciate so much ex Timothy who I hadn't talked to since primary six, Ryan Lo who claimed that he is not familiar with me although we had been in the same class since primary four, Rivka who has very bright smile and Wen Fang who is very helpful etc. Received many notes from friends during the camp. To be honest I cried when I was reading it. LOL.
Since school reopened all subject teachers started giving us pressure, saying that Spm is utterly crucial for each and everyone of us. It's a once in a life time test so make sure we don't regret after receiving the result slip on march 2012. I was always aiming for scholarship thus I bought a table planner and jotted down what should I study every single day. Target done = 8/10.
February 2011
Still studying I think. Enjoyed my life as a prefect and joining activities with friends. Gossiped as usual. AHA! How can I forget about the new year visiting. Followed the the s1 gang and s2 friends. Went to clk's house which is deeeep in the forest, met Pys's brother which look 98% (expanded) like him, and visited Mr Yong's house twice. His son is way too cute.
March 2011
Started texting with someone when I was in the stadium, counting how many rounds the athletes had run.
Besides joining Sports Day was really fun. I don't really mind working under the blisteringly hot sun because walking to parkson to have lunch and a movie if possible with whole lots of friends was my best memory.
HAHAHA and I was in the Duck Kingdom. I was really happy since I'm not in s2 and they still treat me as a part of their 'kingdom'. :)
April 2011
I wish April Fool's Day 2011 can be sensored in my life. Not because I poured Ajinomoto into Liew Jia Lei Then Shi Wei and Aaron Lau's bottle together with Chong Li Kim and made him fooled me that he vomited severely until he couldn't attend Miss Pui's tuition, but sort of thingy just disappeared in my life D;
May 2011, June 2011, July 2011
Keep thinking and thinking. Nothing appeared in my mind. I believe I was battling with exams eh?
August 2011
If I am not wrong, form 5 prefects resigned during this month. Trial one started too. Studied like there was no day and night, setted alarm to wake me up early in the morning for the annoying sejarah especially form 5 bab 7 and bab 8, ate supper almost every night and made my weight accelerated since trial 1, drank coffee to keep me awake until coffee hardly bring any effects on me now.
September 2011, October 2011
Books everyday. Deciding where to study made me devastated. Parents wouldn't let me to study what I want to study but then they never stop asking me to decide where to go after Spm. If only I am rich all those things wouldn't happen. Went to countless education fair and I failed to have any idea about my future. I've told my mum I don't want to further my studies anymore I just wanna bake cakes and cookies then own a bakery shop which offers people with nice coffee. This sounds unreal. I've learnt to face the reality, no one would support me, even me myself doesn't have the confidence to do that.
November 2011, December 2011
Spm. I am not over-confident but I was not studying hard anymore. Even mum was worried about me and reminded me that : ah girl ah. zhe ge bu shi jia jia de kao shi liao, zhe ge shi spm oh. As she said, i was bo lang bo zuak. I myself don't know why, I thought I must be very nervous and study like mad during Spm. Things turned out to be different. Target done everyday = 5/10. *finger crossed, I still hope to get good result please.*
And the day after spm is extremely bore. Wake up at approximately 10am in the morning, clean the clothes, vacuum the floor, hang the clothes, heat the dishes, lunch time, wash the dishes, watch telly, take a nap, texting, facebooking, stalking, day dreaming, and hang outs *YAYY*
I should have find myself a job. Pocket money now < rm50 T___T
In short, every seconds in 2011 is worth remembering. The countdown yesterday is the best countdown in my life. I sincerely hope that we'll all meet each other again after ten years and another ten years. May all dreamers like us achieve our own dreams.
January 2011
Prefect camp. I was in the same group with people I appreciate so much ex Timothy who I hadn't talked to since primary six, Ryan Lo who claimed that he is not familiar with me although we had been in the same class since primary four, Rivka who has very bright smile and Wen Fang who is very helpful etc. Received many notes from friends during the camp. To be honest I cried when I was reading it. LOL.
Since school reopened all subject teachers started giving us pressure, saying that Spm is utterly crucial for each and everyone of us. It's a once in a life time test so make sure we don't regret after receiving the result slip on march 2012. I was always aiming for scholarship thus I bought a table planner and jotted down what should I study every single day. Target done = 8/10.
February 2011
Still studying I think. Enjoyed my life as a prefect and joining activities with friends. Gossiped as usual. AHA! How can I forget about the new year visiting. Followed the the s1 gang and s2 friends. Went to clk's house which is deeeep in the forest, met Pys's brother which look 98% (expanded) like him, and visited Mr Yong's house twice. His son is way too cute.
March 2011
Started texting with someone when I was in the stadium, counting how many rounds the athletes had run.
Besides joining Sports Day was really fun. I don't really mind working under the blisteringly hot sun because walking to parkson to have lunch and a movie if possible with whole lots of friends was my best memory.
HAHAHA and I was in the Duck Kingdom. I was really happy since I'm not in s2 and they still treat me as a part of their 'kingdom'. :)
April 2011
I wish April Fool's Day 2011 can be sensored in my life. Not because I poured Ajinomoto into Liew Jia Lei Then Shi Wei and Aaron Lau's bottle together with Chong Li Kim and made him fooled me that he vomited severely until he couldn't attend Miss Pui's tuition, but sort of thingy just disappeared in my life D;
May 2011, June 2011, July 2011
Keep thinking and thinking. Nothing appeared in my mind. I believe I was battling with exams eh?
August 2011
If I am not wrong, form 5 prefects resigned during this month. Trial one started too. Studied like there was no day and night, setted alarm to wake me up early in the morning for the annoying sejarah especially form 5 bab 7 and bab 8, ate supper almost every night and made my weight accelerated since trial 1, drank coffee to keep me awake until coffee hardly bring any effects on me now.
September 2011, October 2011
Books everyday. Deciding where to study made me devastated. Parents wouldn't let me to study what I want to study but then they never stop asking me to decide where to go after Spm. If only I am rich all those things wouldn't happen. Went to countless education fair and I failed to have any idea about my future. I've told my mum I don't want to further my studies anymore I just wanna bake cakes and cookies then own a bakery shop which offers people with nice coffee. This sounds unreal. I've learnt to face the reality, no one would support me, even me myself doesn't have the confidence to do that.
November 2011, December 2011
Spm. I am not over-confident but I was not studying hard anymore. Even mum was worried about me and reminded me that : ah girl ah. zhe ge bu shi jia jia de kao shi liao, zhe ge shi spm oh. As she said, i was bo lang bo zuak. I myself don't know why, I thought I must be very nervous and study like mad during Spm. Things turned out to be different. Target done everyday = 5/10. *finger crossed, I still hope to get good result please.*
And the day after spm is extremely bore. Wake up at approximately 10am in the morning, clean the clothes, vacuum the floor, hang the clothes, heat the dishes, lunch time, wash the dishes, watch telly, take a nap, texting, facebooking, stalking, day dreaming, and hang outs *YAYY*
I should have find myself a job. Pocket money now < rm50 T___T
In short, every seconds in 2011 is worth remembering. The countdown yesterday is the best countdown in my life. I sincerely hope that we'll all meet each other again after ten years and another ten years. May all dreamers like us achieve our own dreams.
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